Anniversary Blues

Do you know how to spot the adoptive parents in a nice restaurant? They’ll be the ones starting to cry during their fancy anniversary dinner because their daughter grew two inches, and they weren’t there to see it.

Yesterday was our third anniversary. We ate a nice dinner, and we saw my very favorite band perform (lovely of them to come to our city for our anniversary, don’t you think?), and earlier that day we celebrated by both having a dumpster delivered to our driveway and receiving an update on our daughter.

The update on our daughter was clearly the best gift of the day, as it proved she is doing well, but I’ll admit that the dumpster was pretty exciting, too. (Oh, come on, wouldn’t you be excited about finally being able to park the car in the garage and having room for your indoor clothesline in the basement?) (Wait, what? You don’t have an indoor clothesline?)

What I didn’t anticipate was how heartbreaking it would be to realize that we’d missed so much of her life in such a short time. We are so happy that she is doing well, that she is growing (five new pounds in addition to those two new inches–yes!), that the ringworm causing the bald spots on her head is starting to heal, and that we saw a full smile in a photo for first time. At the same time, it hit me hard that we had missed all that. And that’s why we were crying at dinner. Because I brought it up.

And because we are tired.

Oh, we are so very tired. The nights are so short, and there is so much to do, and there is something wearing about having our daughter so very far away from us. I am surprised that we feel it even more acutely now that we are so close to getting to her. I thought it would get better, or at least stay the same. But Jarod put it to words when he said that now it really seems real. We have had her picture for so long, and we have been buying the things that are needed for her and for us as we travel, but it is only now, as leaving for Ethiopia draws near, that it is apparent that this is really happening.

We have so much to get done in these next two weeks and two days. There are two showers, one fundraiser, and myriad tasks. We covet your prayers and well wishes at this time. If ever we needed all the help we can get, it’s now.



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3 responses to “Anniversary Blues

  1. Liz

    It didn’t really seem real to me until I was actually ON the airplane to Ethiopia…sometimes it still doesn’t seem real!

    I’m sorry you are/were sad about what you missed, but there is still so much growth and so many firsts still ahead of you. For example, right now I am looking forward to Elfe’s first fall – she’s never seen the leaves turn beautiful colors, and I think she’s going to love it!

    Hang in there, it’s only a little bit longer…

  2. melanie

    Over the Rhine? I knew you looked like good people. Hope the trip goes beautifully. Can’t help much but am sending just a very little bit. Congratulations!

    • findingmagnolia

      Melanie, thank you so much for your kind gift. Every little bit is so very helpful. Throughout this process, every time there is a need, it is met with just enough to get us through. And that’s all we need, really. Thank you for being part of our “just enough.”

      I will send you a proper thank you once I am back stateside; I hope you will accept this tiny comment thank you as a stand-in until I can get back to my stationery box.

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