Do you know how to spot the adoptive parents in a nice restaurant? They’ll be the ones starting to cry during their fancy anniversary dinner because their daughter grew two inches, and they weren’t there to see it.
Yesterday was our third anniversary. We ate a nice dinner, and we saw my very favorite band perform (lovely of them to come to our city for our anniversary, don’t you think?), and earlier that day we celebrated by both having a dumpster delivered to our driveway and receiving an update on our daughter.
The update on our daughter was clearly the best gift of the day, as it proved she is doing well, but I’ll admit that the dumpster was pretty exciting, too. (Oh, come on, wouldn’t you be excited about finally being able to park the car in the garage and having room for your indoor clothesline in the basement?) (Wait, what? You don’t have an indoor clothesline?)
What I didn’t anticipate was how heartbreaking it would be to realize that we’d missed so much of her life in such a short time. We are so happy that she is doing well, that she is growing (five new pounds in addition to those two new inches–yes!), that the ringworm causing the bald spots on her head is starting to heal, and that we saw a full smile in a photo for first time. At the same time, it hit me hard that we had missed all that. And that’s why we were crying at dinner. Because I brought it up.
And because we are tired.
Oh, we are so very tired. The nights are so short, and there is so much to do, and there is something wearing about having our daughter so very far away from us. I am surprised that we feel it even more acutely now that we are so close to getting to her. I thought it would get better, or at least stay the same. But Jarod put it to words when he said that now it really seems real. We have had her picture for so long, and we have been buying the things that are needed for her and for us as we travel, but it is only now, as leaving for Ethiopia draws near, that it is apparent that this is really happening.
We have so much to get done in these next two weeks and two days. There are two showers, one fundraiser, and myriad tasks. We covet your prayers and well wishes at this time. If ever we needed all the help we can get, it’s now.